I smoke weed. I want it to help me stop too bc I'm on my way to COPD. Husband and I not on good terms at the moment, I was too scared to talk to him about it, but if I did, I would be shot down. Rainbows did not come out. Yesterday was my sisters bday and I called to wish her a happy bday only to find that her, my eldest sister, my mom, and neice were all out eating in Hot Springs, AR and I didn't even get invited- not even mention it to me. Not 1 person called me on my bday. I feel wretched and worthless and unloved. I'm in tears this morning. If it were not for my little girl... :( I'll keep a dim light of hope in my heart that I can make it thru.
Tuesday we got iced in and I didn't go to work. Me and hub are doing fine, spirits are back up. He said last night "sure is different than last Tuesday..referring to the drama...and I replied "no, I'm still really pissed about some things but I choose not to bring it right now." and then at least he knew I wasn't crazy lol. I left my bottle of Adipex on the gun cabinet, he could have done whatever he wanted with them but he never touched them, nor did I (only 2) but Tuesday evening...I flushed them down the toilet...and it didn't even fase me. I have a touch of regret here and there but not really and I'm proud of that. I think I've been on uppers too long in my life...anyway, just wanted to update.
I'm happy to hear you and hubby are doing better. And glad you feel proud of yourself about the meds. I was supposed to see my therapist today but after I got stuck in the snow and pulled out / she got stuck in the snow and did not get pulled out. So my appointment got resceduled for the 18th. I REALLY REALLY need to talk to someone about feeling such a lack of control. The weight I am carrying now is all due to age/pre-menopause or something because I have not changed anything at all. And it's DRIVING ME INSANE!!! We have a gym here right down the street that is only $10 a month w/no contract and I think I'm gonna give it a try. R says I'm just wasting my money because I won't go. But I figure so I try it for 2 months and if I don't use it ...I've lost $20..right.(well $30/there is a $10 sign up fee also). Anyway just something I'm considering. Thanks for the update. Take care.
no subject
Date: 2014-01-31 02:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-31 10:13 pm (UTC)Keep me updated.
update
Date: 2014-02-06 03:03 pm (UTC)Re: update
Date: 2014-02-07 02:52 am (UTC)And glad you feel proud of yourself about the meds.
I was supposed to see my therapist today but after I got stuck in the snow and pulled out / she got stuck in the snow and did not get pulled out. So my appointment got resceduled for the 18th. I REALLY REALLY need to talk to someone about feeling such a lack of control. The weight I am carrying now is all due to age/pre-menopause or something because I have not changed anything at all. And it's DRIVING ME INSANE!!! We have a gym here right down the street that is only $10 a month w/no contract and I think I'm gonna give it a try. R says I'm just wasting my money because I won't go. But I figure so I try it for 2 months and if I don't use it ...I've lost $20..right.(well $30/there is a $10 sign up fee also). Anyway just something I'm considering. Thanks for the update. Take care.